*is explaining the nonion phenomenon*

Limericks.
Slugs.
Pub lunches.
Fairy tales.
Crazy dream/nightmare.
A nasty post on Brighton or Butlins.
Zombie apocalypse.
Nonions.
Star Wars - Taff style.
Monty Python - Taff style.
The origin of pi.
Plato vs. Aristotle.
Chocolate - good or bad for you?.
The smallest country in the world.
Why are villains so damn sexy?
Creepy Halloween stories/movies that have the same lame plot.
The relativity of time.
Rubber ducks.
Air sex.
Palindromes.
Saucy seaside postcards.
Nude calenders.
Toffee apples.
Dung beetles.
Bicarbonate of Soda.
Spinsters and cats.
Chemical toilets.
Light bulbs.
Flea circuses.
Door stops.
Something you do not wish to even think about, let alone write about.
Something about a commonly held belief or myth that you'd like to take umbrage with. 

Original Image

Ok, so I figured it was about time I explained about the nonions. I'm not exactly sure how it all started, except that it was me, my friend and our spouses. Oh, and wine and beer were involved too. Plus a game of Trivial Pursuit.

A few weeks ago we arranged a Trivial Pursuit night at my place. To be fair, this happens quite often, as my friend and her hubby only live across the road, and we all prefer a night in rather than a night out. Usually though, me and the hubby go across the road. I could go into detail about our Trivia nights - like the time we mixed questions from Star Wars, Lord of the Rings and ordinary Trivial Pursuit (man, that was tricky). Or I could tell you how I somehow manage to get the 'easy' questions wrong, but magically get the harder ones right. We have a laugh and a giggle, and the added alcohol brings some extra imagination to the answers (and, indeed, the questions *shifty*).

Anywho, the night in question, we decided to put a few nibbles out so that we could munch while we racked out brains for those elusive answers. My friend brought the tortillas, while me and the hubby supplied the nuts and crisps. Said crisps were onion rings, cheese balls and bacon strips. At some point during the start of the evening, someone asked for an onion ring, only being Taffies, it sounded like 'nonion ring'. We all took the mick, and ever since, onion rings have been nonion rings.

But it doesn't stop there, oh dear me no! Now we substitute an 'n' to start off any word we feel might be improved by it. Sometimes it works, sometimes not, and depending on the level of alcohol in your bloodstream. it has varying levels of hilarity.

For example, my friend, who happens to work in the shop next door to mine, often comes in for a hot coffee or three. Several days after the initial Nonion Event, she came in for her coffees, and as I served her, she asked me if we had any nonion rings.

Now, I work in a Spar shop, and we do indeed sell 'nonion' rings. So I replied, "Yeah! They're next to the nacon nips!"  Er, bacon strips, that is. Anyway, while this was very funny to me and my friend (those of you who are pulling that funny face right now -you know, the one where one eyebrow raises and the mouth droops on one side a little bit - shame on you, you obviously don't understand Taffy humour now, do you?), what was even funnier is that the bloke waiting in line to be served next 'got' it right away. He even started to ennify (I love inventing words). It was awesome. Or, indeed, nawesome.

Anyway, that be the nonions, and how we do it in Taffland. *nods*

Oh and yes, despite the title of today's post, I guess it's not really a phenomenon, but I couldn't resist all those n sounds...

*shifty*

*is not doing THAT*

Limericks.
Slugs.
Pub lunches.
Fairy tales.
Crazy dream/nightmare.
A nasty post on Brighton or Butlins.
Zombie apocalypse.
Nonions.
Star Wars - Taff style.
Monty Python - Taff style.
The origin of pi.
Plato vs. Aristotle.
Chocolate - good or bad for you?.
The smallest country in the world.
Why are villains so damn sexy?
Creepy Halloween stories/movies that have the same lame plot.
The relativity of time.
Rubber ducks.
Air sex.
Palindromes.
Saucy seaside postcards.
Nude calenders.
Toffee apples.
Dung beetles.
Bicarbonate of Soda.
Spinsters and cats.
Chemical toilets.
Light bulbs.
Flea circuses.
Door stops.
Something you do not wish to even think about, let alone write about.
Something about a commonly held belief or myth that you'd like to take umbrage with. 

Original Image

Oh. My. Lordy. I don't even know where to begin on this one...

Anywho, air sex. How about that? Who'd have thunk it? In fact, who would want to think it?? I mean seriously, air sex?  Why on earth would anyone wish to do that?

Air guitaring I get. Well, sort of anyway. Guitaring is a solo activity, yes? I mean yes, you can do it with a partner, or even in a group (still talking air guitaring here, guys), but essentially it is something you are meant to do by yourself. Therefore, air guitaring kind of makes sense. Hey, I even have a crack at air guitaring myself after a vodka or three.

But air sex? Seriously? Ok, so I'm in danger of turning into a cast member from Grey's Anatomy here with all the 'seriouslys', but honestly.... seriously??

Sex is a duo sport, people. Yes, I know every man (and woman) and his dog (but hopefully not with the dog) has done the solo misattribuition thingy, but that's not technically sex, right? Sex is the shortened form of sexual intercourse, so how on earth can you simulate it on stage, fully dressed, with an invisible partner? Not to mention in time with the background music.

It's just wrong on so many levels! If you enjoy the sport that much, grab a partner and sneak behind the stage, that's my advice. *nods* While the competitors are 'performing' the Solo Sex Samba, you and your chosen one can do the Couple Conga. Youknowzitmakezsense!

And that's all I have to say about that. *nods*

*has wealth of knowledge on bicarb*

Limericks.
Slugs.
Pub lunches.
Fairy tales.
Crazy dream/nightmare.
A nasty post on Brighton or Butlins.
Zombie apocalypse.
Nonions.
Star Wars - Taff style.
Monty Python - Taff style.
The origin of pi.
Plato vs. Aristotle.
Chocolate - good or bad for you?.
The smallest country in the world.
Why are villains so damn sexy?
Creepy Halloween stories/movies that have the same lame plot.
The relativity of time.
Rubber ducks.
Air sex.
Palindromes.
Saucy seaside postcards.
Nude calenders.
Toffee apples.
Dung beetles.
Bicarbonate of Soda.
Spinsters and cats.
Chemical toilets.
Light bulbs.
Flea circuses.
Door stops.
Something you do not wish to even think about, let alone write about.
Something about a commonly held belief or myth that you'd like to take umbrage with. 

Original Image

I sold a tub of bicarbonate of soda today at work. Which is odd because it's not something that sells a great deal, but happens to be on my list of things to blog about this month.

The customer actually asked me for baking soda. I told her we had bicarbonate of soda, and baking powder, but not something called baking soda. Then she asked me what it was. Whether she meant bicarb of soda, baking powder, or baking soda, I have no idea, but as I don't really know what any of them are, I said I wasn't sure. *shifty* I then added that baking powder usually goes into cakes (possibly? I actually don't really know as I don't bake), and that my mother used to put bicarb in the pot when she was cooking fresh cauliflower. Stopped the white bit going yellow, or something.

Anywho...

Then I read the bicarb blurb, and it said you could have one part bicarb to two parts of... erm... something else, and it would make baking powder, so figured that bicarb was her best bet. I showed the customer and gave myself a mental pat on the back for being helpful.

Then she told me that she didn't want to use it for cooking anyway, she'd just read that baking soda was good for cleaning a smelly fridge.

*coughs*

I sold her the bicarb in the end because I knew that it can indeed be used to make a fridge sweet-smelling again. How I knew this, I do not know, but know it I did. I mentally punched the air afterwards as I now had something to ramble about for one of my October requests. *grins shiftily* Alas, I'm pretty sure I'm not going to sell or come across any of the other suggested topics over the next few weeks...

*is severely lacking*

Limericks.
Slugs.
Pub lunches.
Fairy tales.
Crazy dream/nightmare.
A nasty post on Brighton or Butlins.
Zombie apocalypse.
Nonions.
Star Wars - Taff style.
Monty Python - Taff style.
The origin of pi.
Plato vs. Aristotle.
Chocolate - good or bad for you?.
The smallest country in the world.
Why are villains so damn sexy?
Creepy Halloween stories/movies that have the same lame plot.
The relativity of time.
Rubber ducks.
Air sex.
Palindromes.
Saucy seaside postcards.
Nude calenders.
Toffee apples.
Dung beetles.
Bicarbonate of Soda.
Spinsters and cats.
Chemical toilets.
Light bulbs.
Flea circuses.
Door stops.
Something you do not wish to even think about, let alone write about.
Something about a commonly held belief or myth that you'd like to take umbrage with. 


You know, I thought it would be easier - or less constricting - if I had the option to pick one of the above subjects rather than work through the list in order, but that's really not the case. I keep reading through the topics, hoping that one of them will inspire something - anything - for me to write about. It's just not happening.


So as I am severely lacking in 'light bulb' moments, I guess I'll have to pick 'light bulbs' as my topic for today.

Now you all know what a light bulb moment is, right? Let me find a picture...

Original image

There, you should know what I mean now.

Anywho, today I am severely lacking in 'light bulb moments' (which I've already said, I know), and as this is something that happens fairly often, I have a sort of strategy for dealing with the problem. Usually I try and find something else to do (something that makes sense for a procrastinator, yes?), and while this often involves something that has nothing whatsoever to do with writing, occasionally I do find myself biting the bullet and plodding along with a different story/blog post etc etc.

Or sometimes I cheat. *shifty*

What I really wanted to blog about today, for example, was how people who don't look after animals shouldn't be allowed to have them. But try as I might, I can't even loosely link that subject to anything from the above list. So I shall have to keep the rage that is currently making my blood boil on a simmer, and remember to post about it another time.

That still doesn't help with today's post though. I've racked my brains, and apart from the many different types of light bulbs that are out there, unless you are a light bulb fanatic, I don't see how it can be of interest to anyone. So I took the 'cheating' route and decided to go with the 'light bulb moment' interpretation.

I'm still waiting for that 'light bulb' moment though, so I guess that means today's post is doomed.

Or maybe that should be 'dimmed', not 'doomed', seeing as my Idea Light Bulb is definitely not shedding much light at the moment.

Oh well, back tomorrow, with a blog about... er... one of the above.

*is changing the post's title*

Original Image

Lordy, October came around far too fast for my liking... but, October it is, therefore I must don my blogging skates and get cracking on this self-imposed challenge. I'll be posting the list of requests that I received at the top of every post this month so that everyone can keep track on me (and check that I'm not cheating *shifty*), plus it will be good for me to cross things off publicly. *nods*

I seem to remember saying that I would blog about these things in the order they were suggested, but as I skimmed over the list (wincing more than once, by the way), I 've decided to tackle whatever takes my fancy each and every day as we go through the month. I have a feeling that several of the harder topics will be bunched together from the 25th onwards. *coughs*

Here goes!

Limericks.
Slugs.
Pub lunches.
Fairy tales.
Crazy dream/nightmare.
A nasty post on Brighton or Butlins.
Zombie apocalypse.
Nonions.
Star Wars - Taff style.
Monty Python - Taff style.
The origin of pi.
Plato vs. Aristotle.
Chocolate - good or bad for you?.
The smallest country in the world.
Why are villains so damn sexy?
Creepy Halloween stories/movies that have the same lame plot.
The relativity of time.
Rubber ducks.
Air sex.
Palindromes.
Saucy seaside postcards.
Nude calenders.
Toffee apples.
Dung beetles.
Bicarbonate of Soda.
Spinsters and cats.
Chemical toilets.
Light bulbs.
Flea circuses.
Door stops.

A month full of madness begins,

I wonder what nonsense it brings?

I asked for requests

For October's blogfest

The mind boggles at some of these things.

Sexy villains and rubber ducks -

These will surely inspire some muck!

I'll be sure to include

Some calenders - nude,

And a toffee apple to suck.

I could say that air sex is hot,

That some movies have a lame plot.

And bicarb of soda?

I'd have preferred Yoda!

Yet I'm stuck with fleas and door stops.

Heaven knows how I'll get through it all,

I'm expecting to hit that Brick Wall

With the relativity of time,

And the origin of pi,

But still, I'm gonna have a ball!

Honestly, I keep reading this list, and all I can think of is... *doomed*

Edit: Oops, I'm supposed to be asterisking my titles too. *shifty*

Edit 2 (I have a feeling this month is going to be a *shifty* one through and through):  Acckkkk!

Somehow I didn't include Jan's suggestions, though I saw them AND commented on them at the time! I will have to fit them in somewhere, and so that they are on record, the suggestions were:

1. Write on something you do not wish to even think about, let alone write about.

2. Something about a commonly held belief or myth that you'd like to take umbrage with. For instance, the myth of soul-mates, or the myth of not enough food in the world to feed the hungry...

Nonions And Stuff

A quick update on how my requests are going for next month's NaBloWriMo, which I am entering (kind of)...

When I asked for requests the other day, I had a big grin on my face, because I knew you guys would pull through for me and come up with some great stuff. I wasn't wrong! So far, I have :

1 - Limericks
2 - Slugs
3 - Pub Lunches
4 - Fairy tales
5 - Crazy Dreams/Nightmares
6 - A really nasty post on Brighton or Butlins
7 - The Zombie Apocalypse

All of the above were posted in the comments on my blog page or my Facebook profile. I also have three requests from 'offline friends', which are:

8 - Nonions (Yup, onions with an 'n' - all will be explained when I post about them. *winks*)
9 - Star Wars in the style of a Taff.
10 - A Monty Python Film in the style of a Taff.

So I'm one third of the way there. Ten down, twenty to go. Don't be shy, offer up a suggestion or two. As you can see from the above, I'll have a go at anything. I prefer something that's a little bit odd (because I'm naturally nutty), but serious stuff is cool too!

So don't forget, leave a comment below, or post on my Facebook profile. And if I know you in the 'real' world, just let me know and I'll add it to the list.

Catch you later!

Image borrowed from here.

Returning With A Request

So summer was a bit busy for me, hence my absence. Technically, the busy-ness ended by the end of the first week of September, but after not blogging for so long, the procrastination thing set in as I told myself I would get back to it 'tomorrow'. Tomorrow turned out to be today, at the almost half-point of September (though I did write for my writers' blog yesterday).

Anywho, today I am officially back, and hopefully with some regularity. Next month is NaBloWriMo (National Blog Writing Month), and I would like to attempt it once again. In 2009 I didn't enter officially as I'd only just started blogging, but there was a post for almost every day. Last year I again didn't enter officially, but after asking for requests, I successfully managed to blog every day of the month.

So I'm going to do the same thing this year. I'm not going to sign up officially, but I am going to blog every day. Hopefully, anyway. But to do that I am going to need requests. Thirty, to be exact. Thirty different suggestions from you guys. Last year I asked for six people to give me five suggestions each, but as there is still two weeks or so until the challenge begins, I thought I'd ask for two suggestions per person. You can either post them here in the comments, or on the link to this post on my Facebook profile. I'll keep checking for comments in both places, and when I hit thirty suggestions, I'll let you all know. The first thirty suggestions will be dutifully recorded, and written about in the order they were given.

There are no restrictions on what you may suggest  - I'm happy to have a go at whatever you throw at me. Can't promise that each suggestion will get a thorough write-up, though. I've been known to put a twist on things and/or cheat a little bit when a subject has got me scratching my head. *shifty* I can promise that I will have a go, though. And also that I will asterisk the titles (if you don't know what I mean by that, have a look at the 'Popular Princess Posts' list on the right, there's usually an asterisked title in there somewhere).

So that's it. Throw some suggestions at me. Go on, I dare you!

Image borrowed from here.

P.S. It's good to be back!