Pants

P is for Pants

When something is making you frown

And things are getting you down

There's no need for rants

Just say 'its all pants!'

(And now I can't think of a noun).

Actually, DON'T ask me... Original Image

Oops

O is for Oops

I generally fall over fresh air

It's something that I do with flair

Alone or in groups

I usually say 'oops'

As a klutz, I am beyond compare!

This is me!!! *nods* Original Image

Nothing

N is for Nothing

Midnight is just minutes away

And I find I have nothing to say

I probably won't boast

About this pants post

But as long as I blog, it's okay!!

Nothing, nada, zilch... Original image.

 

Minions

M is for Minions

According to certain opinions

In order to rule my dominions

I'll need more than me

To run them smoothly

So I'll have to find me some minions!

This is what I need!! Original image.

LOL

L is for LOL

The silliest of things can amuse

Your sense of control you can lose

But laughing out loud

Is always allowed

It's a tonic to chase away blues!

Original image

Knobbly

K is for Knobbly

I've given up aiming for slim

I'm just not made to be thin

From bits that are wobbly

To knees that are knobbly

I'll brazen it out with a grin!

Original image

Jumping

J is for Jumping

I'm not much of an exercise freak

I'm more likely to play hide and seek

I suffer a lack

Of Jumping a Jack

So sadly, my joints tend to creak... 

Nope, that's definitely not me... Original image.

Just made it again!! Pesky late night shifts... *mutters*

Inconceivable

I is for Inconceivable

There are times when nothing makes sense,

When things tend to make you go tense.

If it seems unbelievable

Just yell 'Inconceivable!'

I swear the relief is immense!

See? Look how happy he is!! Original image.

Hunk

H is for Hunk

If you feel like you're stuck in a funk

And you don't feel like getting drunk

Go google some pics

For a visual fix

And spend time with your favourite hunk!

Loves me some Aragorn!! Original image.

Glomp

Aaaaccckkk!! Late shift today, and I only just remembered that I needed to post my letter 'G'! I have 12 minutes to come up with a limerick. *dies*

G is for Glomp

When sending an internet cuddle

Take care not to cause any muddle!

Don't offer a romp

Be sure to type *glomp*!

Then you won't bemuse or befuddle!! 

I love to glomp!! Original image.

Just made it! With ONE minute to spare! *wipes brow*

Flump

F is for Flump

I was teased quite a lot as a child,

By those who were wicked and wild.

I was always quite plump,

So they called me a flump

As a nickname, though, that was mild.

Compared to a ball of fluff!! Original image.

Eeeeeek!

Posting on time today!!!

E is for EEEEEEK!!

Snap decisions are often my bane

I really have no-one to blame.

Results can be bleak -

They make me go EEEEEEEK!

And cause others to think me insane!

Why did I think flower pots were fun??? Original image.

Drinking

D  is for Drinking

Work is done so I've had some wine,

Though I somehow neglected to dine

A bit tipsy am I

But I still dropped by

I just hope that this post turns out fine...

Image my own

*** I'm technically a little late in my posting today, but I'm sure that it's still Friday in several parts of the world. I had a 10 hour shift at work today, you see. And... well, and some wine...

Candy Crush

C is for Candy Crush

I hope you will use your discretion

As I make a quite shameful confession:

I admit to a rush

When I play Candy Crush -

It's become my guilty obsession.

Original image

Balderdash

B is for Balderdash

A comma, a dot, or a hash,

Makes my mind become a mish-mash.

I want to hammer 

The rules of grammar

As to me it's just all balderdash!

Say what? Original image.

ARGH!

My blog has 'procrastination' in the title, my profile has 'procrastinate', 'dither' and 'ramble' in the description, and everyone who knows me even a little bit knows that all of these words are apt when it comes to describing myself. But hey ho, the April A-Z is here once again, and, once again, I have partaken of the crazy juice and signed up for it. So here goes...

A is for ARGH!

That moment I've dreaded arrives,

It's enough to give me the hives.

I'm a nut, to be sure,

But I'll make you endure

These posts made of bunches of fives!*

Me this morning. (Original image)

Note: * Limericks are made up of five lines. Get it?? *shifty*

Catz & Cozies

So much for my once a week posting, huh? *snort* But you know, life gets in the way (as it is wont to do), and the intention is still firmly in place to post as often as I can, and when I have news to share.

SO!

Today, I do have some news to share, albeit a friend's news rather than my own. This friend is Tami, otherwise known as Hart Johnson, Alyse Carlson, or The Watery Tart. I have been friends with Tami since 2005, where we 'met' at an online Harry Potter fan site and became mutual fans of each others fan fictions. We both started our writing careers writing tales with Rowling's wonderful characters, and honed our plotting skills playing with alternative back stories, histories, and theories of the world of Harry Potter.

Tami has recently had her third cozy mystery traditionally published under the pen name of Alyse Carlson, and she is also currently self-publishing a conspiracy series under her Hart Johnson pseudonym. To me, she will always be Tami, though, and the Tami I know shines through in all of her stories. She's fun, fabulous, and feisty - my very favourite type of person!

I'm going to hand the page over to Tami now, who has written a little something to celebrate her third traditionally published novel.

What is it with Cats and Cozies?

Otherwise known as the pussy puzzle...

See, this is how I see it... Cats are cuddly and cozy, and as mysteries go, cozies are cuddly and cozy... they both go very well with a nice cuppa, a comfy chair, and if the time of year calls for it, a crackling fire.

But there is also the lesser known ability of cats to solve mysteries. I bet you didn't know about that. It's because cats are crafty. They lurk and watch and see stuff, and then they have minions under their control!  No, really. If you ever need a spy, no better companion than a cat!

Case in point... Ever try hiding?

If you have a cat, you know this is impossible. They will find you wherever you are and expose you.

But think how handy this is if you are the SEEKER!  That cat will expose the person you are seeking quickly!

A cat's sometimes needed to solve

When the messiest mysteries involve

boxes or strings

or small mouses and things

Those clues that will try our resolve!

No?

I once knew a pussy detective

Who found killers with speed irrespective

Of status or looks

Or their knowledge from books

It gave us a whole new perspective

Erm... am I losing you here? Should I get to the point? (Was I supposed to have a point?)  Pretty sure my orders were to digress...

Available at Amazon and other retailers

So the Garden Society Mysteries have cats on a couple of covers, and more importantly there is a vagabond stray who has a cameo in a few of them. Davey Jones is a tough, but lovable stray who lives by Cam and Annie, and who they feed and talk to from time to time. It probably would be wise to have him solve the murder in the next book of the series, don't you think?

Keeping Mum:  Roanoke, Virginia, is home to some of the country’s most exquisite gardens, and it’s Camellia Harris’s job to promote them. But when a political fundraiser turns deadly, everyone’s a candidate for murder…

Cam and her best friend, Annie, are planning a gala for a local Senate candidate—a murder mystery themed silent auction where the guests bid on who will be the night’s “victim.” Coordinating a beautiful display of fall flowers and planning the perfect fake crime is hard enough, but with a guest list that is a “who’s who” of the Roanoke elite, Cam has her hands full navigating the egos and grudges of her high society guests.

When local financial tycoon Derrick Windermere is found dead next to a shattered pot of chrysanthemums, the night’s fun and games quickly turn serious. Half the guests had good reason to want Windermere dead, but only one is suspiciously missing in action—Annie’s father. Now Cam will not only have to figure out which partygoer is a killer, but find her friend’s father before all their reputations end up dragged through the mud…(from goodreads.com and back cover of book)

Alyse Carlson (aka, Hart Johnson) writes books from her bathtub. A social scientist by day, Hart spends her evenings plotting grand conspiracies and murdering people on paper. You can learn more about her at her blog: waterytart23.blogspot.com

Thanks, Tami! I'll be adding your book to my bookshelf to match your other two. I LOVE have famous friends. *grins*

Windows Hate

Those of you that know me know that I have terrible luck with laptops. I think I've gone through... 5? maybe 6? ... in the last seven years. I don't know what it is when it comes to me and technology, but we just don't mesh. It's not like I treat my laptop like dirt. I mean, I don't knock it about or anything... and though I admit to A LOT of use (a good six hours on a 'good' day), I don't really download anything, or ask my laptop to do more than allow me to use Word and a couple of social media sites.

Nevertheless, I seem to average one laptop a year when it comes to killing them. I'm a murderer of laptops. Maybe I shouldn't be called the Princess of Procrastination, but The Laptop Murderer instead.

After the Tipped Coke Incident

Anywho, I am currently on my latest new laptop. It should be noted that I had this laptop over two months ago, but it is only now that I'm actually using it. Laptop number 5 (or 6, or whatever it was) lost the will to live back in the summer last year. Probably because I accidentally tipped a glass of diet coke all over it. *shifty* (This is the only laptop that I will take full responsibility over for killing -  tipped drink = My Own Fault -  all the other laptop deaths I refuse to accept responsibility for without the presence of my lawyer). I think I've actually been scared to use it just in case I send another laptop to Technological Heaven.

Anyway anyway... now I have a decent laptop. Again. Now I also have a full working keyboard (which honestly, is a bit of a novelty to me seeing as between all the laptop deaths and malfunctions over the last few years, most of the time I've had to make do with a keyboard that has half the letters either missing, or just plain not working).

So far, so good. The problem is now I also have Windows 8. And I hate it, which explains the title of today's post. Incidentally, I wanted to make up my own word combining 'hate' with 'eight', but all that I got was 'height', which didn't sound like 'hate' at all. *digressing*

Anyway...

Windows 8. Why do people mess with things that are working absolutely fine just the way they are? Okay, I realise that technology is always being updated to make things better, but Windows 7 was just fine and dandy as far as I'm concerned. I'm sure that other people think that Windows 8 is the best thing since sliced bread, but personally I don't. I think it sucks. Granted, I don't have a technical brain, so I'm probably not grasping all of the wonderful new things that Windows 8 allows you to do. But still, for my needs, Windows 8 sucks.

I dread to think how long it will be before I can use this laptop with as much ease as I did the older one, but it won't be any time soon. I've never had this much trouble when using a new laptop in the past. Nothing - NOTHING - works the same. I need to keep asking the hubby how to do the most basic of things. And I do mean basic. Like, you know, switching the laptop on, and shutting it down. *shifty once more*

Where's the start menu?? *cries*

And when I hover my mouse too near the right hand side of the screen, strange icons appear from nowhere. I clicked on one by mistake last night and I have NO idea where it took me. And, as hubby wasn't around, it took me ten minutes to figure out how to close the damn thing.

Where's the trusty 'close' icon in the top right hand corner? *cries again*

And the desktop keeps hiding from me. *glares at laptop*

As for downloading... I downloaded the free Kindle app this morning, and before I could download it, I was forced into creating a Microsoft account. WHY?? I never had to have one before.

Ugh.

So yeah, I hate Windows 8. On the bright side, I LOVE being able to type properly again! *silver lining*

Paperback Princess

Hello!!

A quick one this week! I mentioned last week that IF THE SHOE FITS was trickling into retailers in paperback form, and now I can safely say that it's available at most online retailers.*squee* How do I know? Well, first I checked a few places, but more importantly, I also ordered myself a copy. I was pretty impressed, too. I was a bit leery as the paperback is issued via print on demand (POD), but I needn't have worried. I ordered the book on Tuesday last week via Amazon UK, and it arrived a mere two days later. And the quality is fab, too, which is obviously important. Here is my daughter reading it... and it just tickles me no end every time I see this! It's like release day all over again!

The drawback with print on demand is that I have to buy my own copies for giveaways and signings, but my plan is to buy a couple of copies every month, which I will use for online giveaways, and maybe set up a small signing event in my home town.

In other book news, my publisher, Crimson Romance, has teamed up with Amazon.com to offer their entire 2012/2013 backlist titles at $1.99 each for the month of February! So now would be a great time to fill your Kindle with goodies! And an unexpected bonus is that it seems the sale has also extended to other Amazon domains, too. I spotted IF THE SHOE FITS at the bargain price of £1.24 on Amazon UK, and my fellow Crimson authors have reported slashed prices in other countries, too.

In more personal news, I've managed to lose 4lbs in my first week of dieting. Yay! Hopefully I can keep up the momentum. *fingers crossed* I've a long way to go, but this first week's results are definitely encouraging!

That's it for this week, so short and sweet it is. I want to mix things up a bit for my blog posts, so next week will see less of the book stuff, and more of my personal brand of craziness. You have been warned! *snort*

Ta-ta for now!

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!!

Hello, it's only me!!

Yes, I know it's been a while, but I'm still around. Never has there been a more apt blog title than 'Princess of Procrastination'...(and that's a major understatement).

People who know me know just how notoriously BAD I am at keeping up with stuff. I'm pretty sure I have a defective gene when it comes to keeping to a schedule. There are lots of genuine reasons for the lack of blog posts (my full time job, health stuff, lack of inspiration etc), but mostly it's just a case of good old (or bad old) procrastination. I've taken some steps to try and help with this, though.

Book One of The Furry Tale Chronicles

The biggest step was deciding to lay to rest my other blog. I had the best of intentions when I created my Furry Tales Chronicles blog. I wanted to keep my book stuff separate, and continue with the sillies on THIS blog. Trouble is, I can't keep up with one blog, never mind two, and knowing I was neglecting two blogs just made me feel a bit overwhelmed. I'll be posting a short note over there to redirect anyone who stumbles across it over here. I had deleted it initially, but then I realised that the web address is advertised on my publisher's website AND in my 'about the author' notes in my Crimson book. (Duh). But after my little note, there won't be anything new posted over there.

You'll notice that I've added some page tabs at the top of the page. These are just to include the information that was listed on my other blog (see, I did the job properly!). I'm going to do my very best to blog every Monday or Tuesday over here. My usual silliness, most likely (of course!), peppered with personal stuff, and book related stuff as and when there is anything interesting to tell.

Of course, it is January, the month where most people decide to give themselves a kick up the butt, so it's probably no surprise that I decided NOW to be a bit more proactive in my fight against procrastination. But despite 2013 being a GREAT year for me (two books released - yay!), it was also a bit of a sucky year as well. My health hasn't been great, my writing projects received little to no attention, my finances have been skewered, and I've struggled to keep my episodic depression at bay.

I'm determined to do better this year. I want at least one more book under my belt by the end of 2014, and hopefully I can get another novella released, too. I've already been working on SOUL IDENTITY (my epic fantasy), which I plan to publish under my real name when it's eventually finished (most of you know that I publish under a pen name for my romances). And the second of my Furry Tale Chronicles book is well under way. Looking good, so far!

Wedding Wake up call: My son, my daughter, me, & my step-daughter.

My last bit of personal stuff for today is a public declaration of my intention to lose weight this year. You may remember that I lost a whopping 42lbs a few years ago. Unfortunately (as so often happens with us chronic dieters), I put every last pound back on again. *sighs* I did make an effort last year and managed to lose (and keep off) 14lbs, but I gave up far too quickly. Today is the day that I start my new plan. Doctors would tell me that I need to lose 45-50lbs to fall in the 'healthy range', but I'm hoping for a more realistic loss of 30lbs for the time being. That would be put me at around the same weight that I was three years ago, and you know, it felt... nice... not too thin, but definitely not fat. I was recently a bridesmaid for my sister in law, and it was looking at the pictures that gave me the kick up the butt that I needed. Of course, I knew I'd put on weight, but there is nothing like seeing a picture of yourself where you think you look OK, and seeing just how big you've become, to shock you into action. Oh, I know I'm not monstrously huge, but if I'm cringing at the picture, then it's a sure sign that it's time to do something.

I'm not brave enough to publicly announce my actual weight, but I will be giving a weekly update on pounds lost (and not gained, hopefully) over the next few months. Accountability helps.

My Christmas novella, released in December

My last bit of news today (sorry for the extremely long post, but you know, it has been a while *snort*), is that IF THE SHOE FITS is now available in paperback! Yay! I'll get to hold my first book baby in my hands! So far it's only popping up in the US (I've seen it both at Barnes & Noble and Amazon), but it should be showing up in the UK (and other countries, via Amazon) over the next few weeks. I'm tentatively thinking about putting my self-pubbed Christmas novella, MEET ME HALFWAY, out in paperback, too, but at the moment that one is still only available through Amazon's Kindle. I'll let you know if and when that changes!

That's it for now! I'll see you next week, when I'll have some news about promotional stuff for IF THE SHOE FITS. *grins*