Pants

P is for Pants

When something is making you frown

And things are getting you down

There's no need for rants

Just say 'its all pants!'

(And now I can't think of a noun).

Actually, DON'T ask me... Original Image

Oops

O is for Oops

I generally fall over fresh air

It's something that I do with flair

Alone or in groups

I usually say 'oops'

As a klutz, I am beyond compare!

This is me!!! *nods* Original Image

Nothing

N is for Nothing

Midnight is just minutes away

And I find I have nothing to say

I probably won't boast

About this pants post

But as long as I blog, it's okay!!

Nothing, nada, zilch... Original image.

 

Minions

M is for Minions

According to certain opinions

In order to rule my dominions

I'll need more than me

To run them smoothly

So I'll have to find me some minions!

This is what I need!! Original image.

LOL

L is for LOL

The silliest of things can amuse

Your sense of control you can lose

But laughing out loud

Is always allowed

It's a tonic to chase away blues!

Original image

Knobbly

K is for Knobbly

I've given up aiming for slim

I'm just not made to be thin

From bits that are wobbly

To knees that are knobbly

I'll brazen it out with a grin!

Original image

Jumping

J is for Jumping

I'm not much of an exercise freak

I'm more likely to play hide and seek

I suffer a lack

Of Jumping a Jack

So sadly, my joints tend to creak... 

Nope, that's definitely not me... Original image.

Just made it again!! Pesky late night shifts... *mutters*

Inconceivable

I is for Inconceivable

There are times when nothing makes sense,

When things tend to make you go tense.

If it seems unbelievable

Just yell 'Inconceivable!'

I swear the relief is immense!

See? Look how happy he is!! Original image.

Hunk

H is for Hunk

If you feel like you're stuck in a funk

And you don't feel like getting drunk

Go google some pics

For a visual fix

And spend time with your favourite hunk!

Loves me some Aragorn!! Original image.

Glomp

Aaaaccckkk!! Late shift today, and I only just remembered that I needed to post my letter 'G'! I have 12 minutes to come up with a limerick. *dies*

G is for Glomp

When sending an internet cuddle

Take care not to cause any muddle!

Don't offer a romp

Be sure to type *glomp*!

Then you won't bemuse or befuddle!! 

I love to glomp!! Original image.

Just made it! With ONE minute to spare! *wipes brow*

Flump

F is for Flump

I was teased quite a lot as a child,

By those who were wicked and wild.

I was always quite plump,

So they called me a flump

As a nickname, though, that was mild.

Compared to a ball of fluff!! Original image.

Eeeeeek!

Posting on time today!!!

E is for EEEEEEK!!

Snap decisions are often my bane

I really have no-one to blame.

Results can be bleak -

They make me go EEEEEEEK!

And cause others to think me insane!

Why did I think flower pots were fun??? Original image.

Drinking

D  is for Drinking

Work is done so I've had some wine,

Though I somehow neglected to dine

A bit tipsy am I

But I still dropped by

I just hope that this post turns out fine...

Image my own

*** I'm technically a little late in my posting today, but I'm sure that it's still Friday in several parts of the world. I had a 10 hour shift at work today, you see. And... well, and some wine...

Candy Crush

C is for Candy Crush

I hope you will use your discretion

As I make a quite shameful confession:

I admit to a rush

When I play Candy Crush -

It's become my guilty obsession.

Original image

Balderdash

B is for Balderdash

A comma, a dot, or a hash,

Makes my mind become a mish-mash.

I want to hammer 

The rules of grammar

As to me it's just all balderdash!

Say what? Original image.

ARGH!

My blog has 'procrastination' in the title, my profile has 'procrastinate', 'dither' and 'ramble' in the description, and everyone who knows me even a little bit knows that all of these words are apt when it comes to describing myself. But hey ho, the April A-Z is here once again, and, once again, I have partaken of the crazy juice and signed up for it. So here goes...

A is for ARGH!

That moment I've dreaded arrives,

It's enough to give me the hives.

I'm a nut, to be sure,

But I'll make you endure

These posts made of bunches of fives!*

Me this morning. (Original image)

Note: * Limericks are made up of five lines. Get it?? *shifty*

Deflated Princess

You all know that scene from the Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban movie, right? You know, when Professor Lupin jumps in front of Harry to face the Boggart, and said Boggart turns into the moon? Well, remember how the moon became a balloon, and deflated and whizzed round the room? (Ha! That last sentence is almost poetic!) Anyway, that's how I feel at the moment...

Original image

Sheesh!! What a month April was!! I am seriously proud of myself that I managed to complete the A-Z posting challenge on TWO blogs, especially when you consider that I failed right at the end last year when I was just doing ONE blog. I wrote limericks over at my other blog, and scheduled most of them in advance a few at a time, and on THIS blog, I scheduled them the night before they were due. Still, that's a heck of a lot of typing, and having various windows open to add the numerous links that were needed for each post. I'm all linked out. *snort*

Major thanks to my 'CR Sisters' - my fellow authors at Crimson Romance - who stepped up and offered their fabulous books to be promoted by little old me. And HUGE thanks to Tami, who gave me the idea to book blurb to begin with. For someone who dithers no end when it comes to blogging, having a theme was essential, or I would never have managed to do it.

*coughsAvailableAtAmazoncoughs*

Of course, I'm also feeling all 'whooshy' like a deflated balloon for another reason. My debut rom-com released on Monday, and April was NUTSO, what with preparing various interview and guest spots on different blogs, and actively seeking reviews for my book baby. I knew I'd be busy with everything. but it still came as a shock just how busy I'd be. And it's only just beginning! Promotion NEVER ends, and is particularly important when you are a debut author.

I'll have no real idea how it all pans out until I get my first royalty statement from my publisher in September, so until then I'll be crossing my fingers that my book baby gets noticed! In the meantime, THANK YOU so much to those of you who have bought it, or shared a fabulous review of it! Any and all encouragement is fantastic, and gives me the nudge to continue with my writing!

Z is for...

Zero Factor

The Blurb:

Armed and dangerous…

A Cybershock story.

Born a psionic—a rare human prized by the government for her gifts—agridome worker Via Brede lives by two simple rules: slip into stealth mode whenever the cybernetic-enhanced militia is near. And never remove the gloves that block her psychic ability.

During a routine delivery, a tear in her glove connects her with what should be her worst nightmare. A meched-out soldier with bulging muscles and a scarred face that makes her heart pound like a pneumatic drill. She also envisions his death in an attack that happens…now.

Locke’s typically ho-hum mission goes sideways when the stunning, green-eyed bubble farmer plants a sensual kiss that sets fire to every one of his remaining man-nerves. He also sees her vision. His own commander is about to kill him.

He needs Via to find out why. First step is to get her to Old Las Vegas without succumbing to a raw, sexual need that burns in him like fever. Getting there will be a snap. Getting out alive—and winning her trust—might be a little tougher.

by Stacy Gail

Author Bio:

Stacy Gail would love to announce that she is an accomplished concert pianist and can speak seven different languages. Unfortunately, she can’t. “Chopsticks” was the only piano tune she ever mastered, and her idea of speaking another language equates to talking with a funny accent.

There are, however, a couple of things Stacy can do—figure skate and write romances. While skating competitively from the age of eight and learning that perseverance is the true key to success, she began to write stories in between skating events to pass the time. By the age of fourteen, she told her parents she was either going to be a figure skating coach who was also a published romance writer, or a romance writer who was also a skating pro.

Amazingly enough, both dreams have now come true. For more on Stacy, visit her website.

Princess Prattle:

So this is the second book blurb I've posted for Stacy in this A-Z challenge, but Stacy has been so fabulously supportive of my own publication journey, that I'm really glad I was able to swing two promotional posts for her! *glomps Stacy* Love ya, Sweetie! Mwuah!

Book blurbing my way through the challenge on here, and limericking my way through the April A-Z over at The Furry Tale Chronicles. Please stop by!

Y is for...

YIPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Ok, 'Yippeeeeeeeee' isn't in the title of this book, and neither is it the name of the author. Come to think of it, I don't think it's even a word that is used in the book itself, either. But you know, I think I can be forgiven for not strictly sticking to my own rules on today's posting (not that I was particularly strict with some of the other posts this month, either, but that's another blog post...)

Today is release day for IF THE SHOE FITS!!!! Yay! Yippeeeeeeeee! Yabba-dabba do!!! *snorts and dances at the same time*   (Hmmm, would that be *snances* or *dorts*? I'm going with *snances*).

*coughs* Ok, now that we have that out of the way, I'll proceed with the posting format that I have used for all of the book blurbs that I have posted so far for the April A-Z...

The Blurb:

Life isn’t a fairy tale… except when it is.

There’s nothing wrong with Ella Gibson’s life— it just isn’t very exciting, despite being surrounded by lingerie. Working for Cardiff’s top modelling agency should have been glamorous, but most of the time Ella is running around with memos and cups of coffee. It’s a far cry from living the dream, but skirting the edge of her fantasy life is enough.

Then comes the day when her cat starts to talk, claiming to be Ella’s fairy godmother. As if that weren’t crazy enough, the pesky puss becomes a fashion advisor and behavioral expert, too. Add an evil ex-stepmother, a hunk called Charming, plus a looming party-cum-ball, and you have all the elements of a classical fairy tale. There’s even a couple of ugly sisters—the fact that they are two gorgeous gay men being neither here nor there.

Ella’s not your typical fairy-tale princess though, and it will take more than a discarded glass slipper to get her man. It’s quite possible she may have to curb her enthusiasm for cursing a wee bit, not to mention her love of vodka. And can Muse, her surprisingly straight-laced feline friend, overcome her prudishness long enough for Ella to sneak a kiss or three with her intended beau?

by Amber T. Smith

Author Bio:

It's meeeee!!!!!  Er... I mean: Amber T. Smith lives in Cardiff, the bustling capital city of Wales. When she isn’t busy keeping her kids, her cats, and her lizards from fighting, she can generally be found dreaming up new plots for alternative fairy tales.

I don't think I can link to the same blog that I'm using *snort*, but if you would like to follow my madness, feel free to come here, my main blogging page, or visit me at my book blog (where I've been limericking my way through the April A-Z). I'm also on Twitter and Facebook if you'd like to say 'hello'. I love talking with new friends! (I love talking in general, but prefer it when there are people who answer me back, rather than babbling to an empty void *winks*).

X is for...

Mr X

X is a tricky letter, but with a 'mystery man' featuring in the blurb for this book, and 'Mr X' a common way of naming a mystery person, I again cheated a little. Issallgood, though, innit? *winks*

The Blurb:

After being dumped by her cheating boyfriend, Maggie Tyler’s inner crazy person is about to be unleashed. Once free, Crazy Lady wreaks havoc on Maggie’s orderly life. By the time she wrestles the monster back into its cage, Maggie is fired from her cushy position as an executive assistant. Out of work, and unemployable, she’s forced to take a job manning the balloon stand at Party World. She wears a furry Binky the Baboon costume, hoping no one from her past will see her. All goes well until a wise-ass teenager opens the floodgates for an encore performance of Crazy Lady. Maggie is canned once again.

With the bill collectors swarming like sharks, she is forced to take a job tending bar at Frank’s Rock Club. Complications mount when her sullen teenage niece Becca arrives for the summer, along with a stray and very battle-scarred cat. As Maggie begins her new life, she jettisons her most destructive habits…smoking and love, and is joined on her journey by her friend, Pat, an emotionally battered veteran of the dating scene who bears the skid marks of too many failed relationships. Despite her resolve, Maggie finds herself drawn to David, a man of mystery. Is he the man of her dreams or the stuff of her worst nightmare?

As Maggie, Pat and Becca pick their way along the road toward true love, they find themselves facing unforeseen roadblocks.. not the least of which is organized crime. Is Mystery Man a criminal? Will Frank turn out to be Pat’s soulmate? Will the arrival of Becca’s mom throw ice water on her burgeoning romance? Does love triumph? Well, of course!

by Bea Moon

Author Bio:

Bea Moon is a former Vermonter, who made a beeline to South Florida at the first opportunity. She’s worked at many things, from waitress to executive secretary, with stopovers as newspaper columnist and freelance editor. She’s eighty years old and still doesn’t know what she wants to be when she grows up. She love music (everything from Randy Travis to Pavarotti), reading, Downton Abbey, Dexter, and the Miami Dolphins. She reads palms (strictly for fun), and is fascinated by possibility of reincarnation.

Princess Prattle:

As I stated above, 'X' is a tricky letter, but I had to make it fit for this book! The cover is great, there's loads of lovely angsty goodness in the plot, plus there's a cat in there too! Not only that, but I just really want to be like this fabulous lady author 'when I grow up' too! If I'm still writing novels at the age of 80, I will be over the moon (no pun intended). What a fabulous inspiration to struggling writers everywhere!

Book blurbing my way through the challenge on here, and limericking my way through the April A-Z over at The Furry Tale Chronicles. Please stop by!!