Warning - Some posts may cause choking, spitting of beverage and /or a severe giggle fit. This advice brought to you by regular reader Louisa.

Monday, 10 May 2010

Magnificent Mojos

This request buisness has been pretty good for my writing mojo. After successfully blogging for two solid months, then being pretty good in December (I managed to blog 15 times, which when I think about how mad December was, is not bad at all), I virtually disappeared. This is blog number eleven of 2010. Bad. Very bad. Anyway, as I was saying, this request malarkey is great, because it appears that by having someone suggest a topic for me, it has actually pushed me into writing regularly again. Okay, so we are only on the fifth consecutive day now, but my blog count for January was a big fat zero, while February only had one blog posted for the entire month.

Moving on.

My fave NaNo novel illustrator, Ana, came up with her second topic suggestion for this round of requests, and as usual, she has picked something close to my heart. Namely mojos.

Now, I have blogged about mojos before. In fact, I seem to remember saying that my 'Mojo Moments' would be a semi-regular blog topic. *coughs*  My first Mojo Moment was way back in my first week of blogging, and was all about my ultimate mojo, Aragorn (of Lord of the Rings fame). I rambled extensively about the advantages of being hot, dirty, and owning a big sword. Good fun for all, I would think. I think I forgot all about my intention of blogging about mojos semi-regularly after that (forgetfulness is one of the banes of being a procrastinator), until about seven weeks later.

The madness of November (NaNoWriMo anyone?) ended on a surprising high when I not only managed to blog almost every day (I missed once), but I also managed to complete the 50,000 word novel challenge that I had been suckered into by my good friend Tami (Confessions of a Watery Tart). What better way to celebrate than to blog all about the mojo that is Dean Winchester (a.k.a. Jensen Ackles) of Supernatural fame?  I got to insert plenty of innuendo into my post (always a good thing), managed to include several increasingly hot pictures of said mojo, and was also able to use copious amounts of asteriskisms, which are quite possibly my favorite things in the world. *fondly remembers asteriskisms blog post* [/shameless self-plugging once more].

Anywho, after only a mere *shifty* six months, here I am blogging about mojos again. Okay, so far all I have done is ramble about my previous blogs and added links (shameless plugs) to several things (mostly because I'm still strangely impressed that I can actually do this kind of thing without stuffing it up)  but I'm getting to new stuff, I swear.

My Mojo Cupboard is pretty full, I have to admit. Accompanying Aragorn the Hot and Dean the Droolworthy are more than a handful of gorgeous hunks that, as far as I'm concerned, were put on this earth for the purpose of making me (and several million other women) drool. Yes, I know that's a bit shallow.... Tara, these men are people too, not just eye candy! They are talented as well as hot, and would probably be insulted if they thought people only liked them for their looks.... but honestly, the whole point of mojos is that they give visual pleasure (at the very least) to hoards of women all over the world, and are unavailable, thus safe to fantasize over. Yes, they're intelligent, talented people who are more than just merely good -looking actors (or fictional characters, as the case may be), but when we fantasize about our mojos, we aren't imagining how sexy they would be if they were working out a quadratic equation.

And lets face it, mojos are perfect fantasy material. I'm pretty sure that there isn't a single perfect person, be it male or female, in the world right now. Everyone has faults, no matter how nice they are. But mojos are perfect. They always look perfect, always act in the way that you love, and sometimes wear sexy lingerie just the way you like it *coughs* Find me a man like that in real life and I'll eat my laptop. And this is why we love our mojos. It's pure escapism, fun, and a little bit naughty to have private droolfests over people we are never likely to meet in a million years. And quite honestly, I'm pretty sure that most of my mojos, while publicly holding themselves aloof, are privately a little bit chuffed that they bring so much pleasure to women all over the world. At least, I like to think so.

I suppose I can't finish today's blog without having a proper Mojo Moment. I've rambled a fair bit already, but haven't actually mentioned any of my other mojos. I could wax lyrical about Mr. Darcy, or perhaps enthusiastically witter away about Johnny Depp, but I think I'm going to go with Ian Somerhalder. Mr. Somerhalder stars as Damon Salvatore in the American TV series The Vampire Diaries.

Now, I've blogged before about my TV addictions, and this series is another habit that I have. I'm not one for vampires in general; I can't stand anything to do with Twilight, and the phenomenon that is True Blood has completely passed me by. To be truthful, The Vampire Diaries is not that great; the plot is contrived, the characters predictable, and the overuse of music with moody overtures can be a bit, well, overused. But I'm a sucker (no pun intended) for a bad boy, and Damon Salvatore is truly a bad boy. He treats women like dirt, traumatizes his brother on an hourly basis, and thoroughly enjoys himself when he is in full vampire mode. But as with all bad boys, you know that deep down (very deep down with this one) lies a poor wounded little boy lost. *sighs in Scarlett O'Hara fashion*

Okay, it's a fantasy, I know. Real-life bad boys are rarely soft and cuddly on the inside, but if you were paying attention, you would know that the word 'fantasy' is the key here.

As I said before, The Vampire Diaries is not fantastic. I think I would have given up on it a long time ago if it wasn't for the character of Damon. In fact, I already did give up on it last year. I watched two or three episodes and decided that it wasn't my cup of tea at all. Then the crappiness that is British TV at the moment forced me into looking online for other viewing pleasures, and I decided to give the series another shot. If nothing else, I can hit the mute button and freeze frame all the Damon scenes (especially the shirtless ones), right?

And don't roll your eyes at me, because I know you do that too (or at least I hope you do....)

Ahh, I loves me my mojos. *sighs happily*

Next request?